Forgiveness

For those of you who don't know, not only do I teach Sunday School to the middle school girls at church, but I also help with 2nd and 3rd graders on Wednesday nights. (FYI: this isn't one of those I'm so awesome things; it's just that people seem to know I'm involved in one or the other, so sometimes it's confusing; I'm just setting the background here.)

Okay, so tonight we were sort of wrapping up Genesis and the story of Joseph, and guess what? You got it! I learned something new from a story I've known practically all my life. Or rather, God gave me a new perspective on it. Namely, the concept of forgiveness and all that goes with it.

How many times have we wronged someone and said, "I'm sorry", expecting that to be the end of it? And how many times are we upset and angry when it seems like that's not good enough? We're mad at the person we sinned against because it feels like they haven't forgiven us. Yet, when the shoe is on the other foot, do we really know the meaning of forgiveness? Are we as quick to let go as we expect others to be?

I'd always looked at Joseph's little tests for his brothers as a sort of selfish game. I mean, if he was going to forgive them, why make them jump through all these hoops first, right? Well, we watched this little video after we taught the lesson, and seeing it played out, even fictionally, helped me to see that Joseph was actually setting up a similar scenario to the one in which he had found himself in order to give his brothers the opportunity to act differently this time. It immediately made me think of the interaction between Peter and Jesus in Matthew 21:15-19. Jesus had Peter affirm his love for Jesus the exact number of times that Peter had denied Him. It was almost like He was giving Peter a second chance to make the right choice, and it showed Peter that Christ forgave him fully. In the same way, Joseph was testing the hearts of his brothers. Suddenly, what he's doing makes more sense, huh?

And let's be honest, if anyone deserved to be able to hold a grudge, it was Joseph. Yet he freely forgave his brothers and gave them more than they could have ever asked for. Sound familiar? I'll let you dwell on the parallels for a few minutes.

The question for us is: Do I forgive this way? Or do I hold back a part of my forgiveness, so I can bring the sin back up later when it suits me? Do I say I forgive, but then feel superior to the one I've forgiven? Do I pretend that everything is okay, but in reality hold on to my pride and nurse the hurt against me? It's so easy for us to say that it's no big deal or that everything's okay, while in reality never forgiving at all. If you're in that spot, God tells you what to do in Matthew 18:15-17. You don't let bitterness fester in your heart, you gently confront the one you feel has wronged you with their sin. And if you are the one wronged, the Bible has a word for you, too, just a few verses later (21-35).

You see, "he who is forgiven little, loves little" (Luke 7:47). We all need forgiveness from others from time to time, because we're all sinners. And recognizing that fact should spur you to forgive even more freely and easily. It's those who don't realize how much forgiveness they've needed who would rather hold a grudge.

And who are we, especially those who call ourselves Christians, to refuse forgiveness? "And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience-among whom we all one lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespass, made us alive together with Christ- by grace you have been saved-and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Jesus Christ. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. (Ephesians 2:1-9) Do you see it? What hypocrites we are if we refuse to fully and freely forgive anyone! We have been given such grace and forgiven of the sins we committed against God, sins that cost His Son His life! How dare we refuse forgiveness?!?

So I ask you, who have you been withholding the fullness of your forgiveness from? Who are you carrying a grudge against that you need to be reconciled to? Go, and show someone a little bit of grace. You'll be living out the gospel!

Lord, thank You for Your grace. Thank You for Your unselfish forgiveness. Thank You that I don't have to earn it, but You, in Your goodness, freely give it to me if I will but repent if my sins and turn to You in faith. Forgive me for the times I have withheld my forgiveness or harbored resentment against someone, making a mockery of the gospel. Help me, Lord, to recognize those areas of my life where I need to ask for forgiveness and those areas of my life where I need to extend forgiveness. Where I have wronged, give me the strength to humble myself and ask for forgiveness. Where I have been wronged, give me the grace to forgive fully and freely, without holding back. Let me be the salt and the light for You, Lord, to stand out for You in a world that has seemingly forgotten You. Amen.

I'm Guilty of Adultery...

...and you are, too. *GASP* Okay, I'll admit that the title of this particular entry is aimed to get your attention. And just to clear the air, I'm not guilty of adultery in the sense you would first think of.

Now that that's out of the way, I read through Numbers 5 today and basically got a beat-down. But before I get to that, let's take a look at the very beginning of the chapter. God proscribes the ways in which the unclean are to be put outside of the Israelite camp and then how they are to confess and make restitution for their sins. What amazing grace that God has given us! We who are saved were once unclean and separated from His presence, needing someone to make restitution for us, since there was no way we could do it on our own. And God provided a way through His Son! We no longer have to be separated, outside the camp! That's a blessing beyond compare!!

But, back to the spiritual smackdown. The next section in the chapter regards a test for adultery. Now, I'm not going to get into all of the whys and wherefores of it being a test for women, and the agonies it seemed she would suffer if she was guilty, et cetera, et cetera. That's not what I took away from this. What I did learn is this: that woman being tested? It's me. And unfortunately, I'm guilty. You see, there's another kind of adultery that our society doesn't necessarily think of right off, and certainly doesn't take as seriously as it should: spiritual adultery. That's right, I said it. We "cheat" on God daily.

I mean, think about it. How often do we make idols out of something else? And I'm not just talking about celebrities here. We can all too easily make idols out of other things, too. Television, books, magazines, work, our own anger and bitterness towards someone or a situation, our pride or comfort. We can make idols out of things that society tells us are good ideals: justice, patriotism, philanthropy, religion. We can even make idols out of God's blessings. Our spouses or children can quickly replace God as the supreme being in our hearts. How easy it is to make an idol out of acts of service, and replace Christ as the way to heaven with our good works. See how easy it is?

Now, don't mistake me here. I'm not saying that watching a television show, reading a book, serving at church, or loving your family is a bad thing. That would be idiotic. What I am saying is that what you devote your time and energies to shows what or who the most important thing in your life is. What do people think about when they think of you, about the core of who you are and what really defines you? What do you spend the majority of your time thinking about or working towards?

This was a kick-in-the-gut moment for me. Lately, Christ has been realigning my goals, thoughts, actions, etc. with His will for my life and I have been trying to obediently follow. I can see a difference. But that hasn't always been the case, and doesn't mean that I won't turn aside for other things again from time to time. I'm still a sinner. But, praise God, I am a sinner saved by grace. The end game for me is to see Christ's face some day and hear the words, "Well done, good and faithful servant...Enter into the joy of your master" (Matthew 25:21). Note that word: faithful. That's what I will strive for in my life. Not just faithfulness to my husband and my family, but faithfulness to my Master, my Savior, my Lord.

Faithfulness is a binding word. What I mean by that is that it draws the one completing the action (being faithful) ever closer to the object of the action (the one you are being faithful to). How could I not want to be bound to my Lord? How could I not want to be closer to the One who gave His life for me? With that in mind, how could I stray? How dare I allow anything in my life to usurp the rightful place of Christ in it?

Lord, I thank You that You are a holy and jealous God. I thank You that You will not share my loyalties with anyone or anything else and that You will allow no other to sit on the throne of my heart. Lord, I pray that you will bind me to You. Help me to abide in You. Draw me daily closer to the One who died for me and deserves, by no other virtue than His own, my unwavering faithfulness to Him. Forgive me for the times that I have committed spiritual adultery, chasing after the things of this world, or even just placing Your gifts to me above the Giver. Open my eyes to the times that this is happening in my life, and give me strength to overcome the temptation. Amen.

Boundaries and Grace

So, I'm currently attempting to read through the Bible. My intention is to read through, and then go back and study more intentionally. Luckily, through the grace of God, I am still seeing something new in each chapter and verse I read.

Today, I read through Numbers 4. On the surface, it seems a bit dry and not very engaging, but there were several things that struck me and caused me to be in awe and wonder of my God yet again.

You see, in Numbers 4, God is laying out the rules for who is responsible for what with regards to the Tent of Meeting and all that lay within it for worship. If you read it, you'll notice that this isn't something that's arbitrarily decided. Each clan was numbered and had specific duties to perform and designated ways in which they were to perform them. Let's stop right there and dwell on this for a second, okay? God knew how many men within a certain age range were within each clan. Reading that, my mind immediately leapt forward to Matthew 10:30 where Christ tells us even the very hairs on our head are numbered. Can you even grasp God's intimate, infinite knowledge of you? My mind won't even wrap around that!

The next thing that stood out to me was that God showed these men an amazing grace in setting out specific boundaries for each of them. Each clan had a set group of items that they were allowed to touch and carry. Each of those items was to be wrapped, placed and taken up in a certain way. One clan even has a specific command NOT to do something. There was no doubt what was expected of them, and certainly no questioning or arguing with it. It reminded me that God has set specific boundaries and guidelines for those of us who are His children, as well. We have access to all of His commands, all of His requirements, through His Word. There should be no doubt or gray areas for us, either. Not only that, but we are equally blessed in that God knows the boundaries He has set for us and just how far He will allow us to go within those boundaries, whether we realize it or not. Now, there may be more room for "error" (read: sin) in our daily lives then there were in the directions God gave to the clans in Numbers 4, but again, we can be assured that God will only let us go so far before we are disciplined. In addition to that, our sin, if we are saved, has already been paid for! What a gift! What grace!

Another thing that stood out to me is that, as the people of God, they were not asked politely to serve. In this case, they weren't even asked where they wanted to serve. God simply commanded them to do it. The same is no less true of us today. Again, we may have a bit more freedom, but we are not asked whether we want to serve. We are told to be as our Master and commanded to serve others. This is something Christians fail at too often today. We make too many excuses. Look, if you have time to watch your favorite TV show, you have time to serve. If you are asked to serve in a certain area, and don't think you're gifted there, do it anyway. You might surprise yourself! And if not, there are always plenty of other ways to serve. JUST DO IT.

Finally, I was reminded again how blessed we are in Christ. Remember that "do not" command I spoke about earlier? It was that they shouldn't look upon the holy things, lest they die. Whoa! What a difference for us, right? Christ tore that veil for us and made a way that we would be able to approach and have fellowship with a God so holy that man couldn't even look on the holy things used to worship Him, lest their lives be forfeit. And yet, we can come before Him in prayer. We will one day see His face. And, perhaps most thrilling and incomprehensible of all, we can call Him Father.

Lord, thank You for being an omnipotent, holy God. Thank You that You have loved me enough that You would know the numbers of hair on my head. I can't fathom what that even means, Lord, for your ways are so far above me. Thank You for opening Your Word to me in ways I've never known before. Thank You for helping me to see the holiness and grace in the seemingly mundane. Forgive me for the times I've overlooked it or been too arrogant to care. Continue to grow me in grace and truth.

The Power of Prayer

Today's sermon was from Acts 12:1-24. It was AMAZING! This Scripture tells of Herod Agrippa's killing of James, arrest of Peter, Peter's rescue by God, and Herod's subsequent judgment by God as evidenced in his gruesome death.

The title of the sermon was "Resistance Is Futile", the idea being that God's power and sovereignty is such that no one and nothing can resist what God has ordained. While this is true and amazing and encouraging, there was another aspect of the sermon that Pastor Nick spent some time on that really impacted me today.

That is the power of prayer, and not just that, but the type of prayer. Too often, our prayers are superficial and perfunctory, an obligation to get through so we can get back to other things. We don't treat it the way we should, nor with the respect it deserves. Our prayers are not just floating out into thin air, they're going directly to God's ears. Talk about power!

The very fact that we are even able to come before the throne of God with confidence (albeit with a reverent fear) is an amazing grace of God that we don't deserve and should never take for granted. Beyond that, the Bible tells us that when we ask for the things that are in line with God's will IN FAITH, we will receive it!

In short, I was very convicted today about my own prayer life. I need to be more intentional in my prayers. I need to be more faithful and faith-filled in my prayers. I need to spend more time in prayer, and I need to be more grateful for the grace provided to me to allow me to approach His throne as a confident daughter, knowing that He will answer my prayers and that He will answer them in power.

Thank You, Lord, for the opportunity to come before Your throne and be heard. Thank You that You will answer my prayers in power and with joy when I pray what is in line with Your will. Thank You that by Your grace, as You sanctify me, that my prayers will be ever more in line with Your will. Forgive me for the times when I have prayed without purpose, without faith, without thankfulness, and just out of duty. Thank you for Your Son, who out of His great love, died on the cross to atone for my sins while I still hated Him. Thank You that He rose on the third day, conquering over sin and death, and then loved me enough to save me, adopting me into Your family and allowing me to approach Your throne in confidence. Thank You that You work all things together for my good, and for faithful preachers and teachers of Your Word. I love You Lord, and make that love grow ever stronger as you sanctify me each and every second of every minute of every hour of every day. Amen.